The Joy of Six...

Friendship and Gratitude

  As I was looking through my blogroll checking to see where I need to make my next visits, I couldn’t help but think about all the truly wonderful people that have touched my life since I started blogging.  As I read each title a crystal clear picture of that blogging friend popped into my head; for by now I already know what most of them look like through pictures they have shared on their blogs.  But there are still a few that are yet a mystery and I have conjured up a distinct image in my head of what they could possibly look like.  You know how those images are….most of the time they’re completely wrong and you are totally stunned when you actually see that person looked nothing like you imagined.  It’s the same when you get a chance to hear their voices for the first time too. 

 

We’ve all shared so many personal moments with each other.  Some moments were shared in sorrow and grief where we lifted each other up in our comments and e-mails to one another…in words of encouragement and support.  Many moments were shared in joy and laughter…..so many…..for we are a community of comedians who love to make one another laugh, and spread joy through our words and our hearts.  You all know just what I’m talking about. 

 

I have read some of your posts and have cried as I’ve taken the emotion of your heartfelt thoughts with me throughout my day.  I’ve sat in my bed pondering some of the things you’ve written or laughed over a particularly ridiculous cartoon you've posted....or daydreamed over an exceptionally beautiful photograph you took.  I’ve rehashed in my head some of the kindest comments left on a post that were so warm and thoughtful I wished there was a way I could have been able to reach out and given you a hug.   

 

I have made some changes to my blogroll over the nearly three years since I started blogging; but as I look at the list, I’m feeling so very grateful for all of my friends….those that have been with me for quite some time……. Ronni, Suzann, Winston, Judy, Kay, Janeywan, Junie, Joared, Buffy, Peggy, Chancy, Elsie, Liz, Mary, Maria, Peter, Merle, Jen, Roberta, Susan, Lea, Marty, Mark, Cop Car, Lucy, Troy, Bob, Rain, Toraa, Miffy, Paul, Marilyn, Mary Lou, Cassie, Grannymar, Tamarika, Betty, and a very sweet and lovely lady who passed away on June 15^th who many of us loved and visited on a daily basis….Joycelyn Ward, aka Maya’s Granny….she will be dearly missed.   

 

And those that have been more recent additions.... 

Virginia, Darlene, Denise, Val, Claudia, and Bear Naked; but it feels like they’ve been long-time friends already.  We’ve had many outrageous and wonderful e-mails between us and they are all great and unique individuals.  That's the beauty of this community. 

Virginia has helped me with codes for the buttons on my side bars.  There’s no way I could have done that without her.  Denise is the Senior Community Manager on the BlogHer site.  She is not only one of the nicest people I’ve ever known, but she is one sharp lady…..and I’m so grateful to have her to work with.

 

We have many things to be thankful for in our lives, and we all need to take inventory of that from time to time to really appreciate what we have.  Friends are a blessing…..you bring a lot of joy into my life my dear friends.   ~Joy

Christmas Guilt

I’ve been feeling pretty organized about Christmas this year.  My shopping is all done and I’m thinking about wrapping everything in preparation for shipping a good portion of it to Bella and Bastian.  It’s going to be a lot this year.  Who am I kidding….it’s a lot every year.  But this year there seems to be some fairly large gifts going through the mail.  I think I may even take it all to a UPS store to have them box it all up and ship it…..a lot easier for me.                                                 

I just mailed a box of ornaments to the babes to add to their tree.  Bella is very excited about the prospect of getting her hands on them.                                          

“When they coming Grandma?  How many days?”                                                                                                    

I mailed my Christmas Cards too.  I should be feeling pretty good about things.  But there’s just one small thing I’m not feeling so great about.                                                                   

I made the conscious decision to NOT put up all of my Christmas decorations this year.  When I say ‘all’….I mean ‘any.’                                                                     

If you’ve read any of my past Christmas posts before, you may know that I have a TON of decorations.  Walking in my house is not so different from walking into a Hallmark store, honestly.  And when I take the full day….or two... it takes to decorate, I put EVERYTHING out.  People love to come to the house to see it all, but their brains just can’t take it all in fast enough.  It’s truly “A Wonderland of JOY.”                                                                                                                     

I would normally have everything up, lit, and shining by now.  I usually do it the day after Thanksgiving or so.  I made the decision to forgo decorating this year because:                                                                                          

1) I won’t be here for the holidays.  We’re all going to my daughter, Julie’s this year….and we’re really looking forward to it.                                                                            

2) It’s a heck of a lot of work to put everything up….and NOT be able to bask in the glory and fully appreciate it.                                                                                                       

3) It’s a heck of a lot of work taking everything down and putting it away….the part I hate the most.                                                                                                    

I’ve mentally flipped a coin as to whether these were good enough excuses for my decision.  I think they are; but I’m such a traditionalist when it comes to this stuff…that I’m having some major withdrawal problems.  I’ve been trying not to think about all my stuff sitting in storage for another year. I think I need to be talked down from the ledge.                                                                                                                        

I have hoards of snowmen that have been waiting for their yearly outing…only to be stuck in solitary confinement for another long year….and at MY hands.  I feel like such a traitor.                                                                                                       

I have candles that need to be lit,

...wreaths that need to be hung,

  ...angels that need to fly,

  ...and all kinds of Christmas tchotchkes that need to be seen.                                                                                      

And the tree…..OH, MY TREE!!!                                                                                                          

I haven’t been able to put the tree up by myself in years.  It’s an epic job in itself.  Joe and Jen always help me with it every year. I’m hopeless.  If there is even one spare milometer that doesn’t have an ornament attached to it….I don’t know where it is.  My kids are always half frustrated and half amused when they try to fit all the ornaments I have….and somehow continue to get…..on this one lone tree. I’m sure I could decorate two or three trees easily.  But they’re troopers….and they know it means a lot to me.  Truth be told….it means a lot to them too.  Don’t think they don’t know exactly what ornaments might be missing from the collection….and seek every last one out.  It’s a job in itself, and I appreciate their patience….and their love of tradition as well.                                                                                          

So, here I am.  Every time I pass the room where my decorations are being held hostage, I get a little warm and flushed feeling.  I just try to walk away quickly.  The other day I did have Joe get down the wreath for the front door…and I put it up.  I thought….’that’s harmless enough.’  But now every time I go in or out of the house that wreath reminds me of the SCROOGE that I am this year.  And now I wonder what kind of a reception my poor little wreath will receive when I put him away this year.  Will the other wreaths want to wring his little ‘needled-neck?’                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

I wonder if there's a Christmas Hotline  I can call.

All Things BlogHer

My head is fuzzy, my brain is mush, and my eyes are blurry and popping out of my head…..and that’s the good stuff.                                                                                       

BlogHer launched it’s new site redesign on Tuesday of this week.  It looks GREAT!  Of course along with any major overhaul of this nature comes many glitches, updates and adjustments.  The BlogHer team has been working on ‘overload’ for quite some time now; and this week we all took it to another level.                                                                

What a great bunch of people, and I want to say some thank you’s to a few who have managed to keep my brain as unscrambled as possible.  Thank you to Denise….who is just so great in every way; and though we’ve just started working together, I feel like I’ve known her forever.  Thank you to Mike and Graham for all your technical savvy and perseverance…I’d give anything to understand even half of what you do.  Thank you to Kristin and Kristy, who are so invaluable to BlogHer I can’t imagine being without them.   And, of course, to the Terrific Trio….Lisa, Jory and Elisa, who have managed to stay afloat even with the most exhausting and hectic schedules I’ve seen in a long time.                                                                                                            

Timing is everything….and on the heels of this launch just happens to come BlogHer ’07; right here in my backyard.  The conference opened this morning and will run through Sunday, the 29th in the Grand Ballroom at Navy Pier in Chicago.  I’ll be joining the festivities, along with the 750+ other blogging addicts who already have a day up on me.  What an amazing agenda BlogHer ’07 has.                                                                                       

Aside from the wonderful sessions, panels and speakers, (Elizabeth Edwards  included)….there are all sorts of demos and displays, raffles, cocktail receptions, breakfasts, lunches, live music…..lots of food and drink and even the Yahoo Internet Café and Bookstore.  There’s so much going on, I don’t know if I could survive three days.  But while I’m there, I plan to take it all in and hope that Jory will catch me if I start to wilt…she’s good at that; and doesn’t really have a concept of what wilting is.                                                                                                                           

I'm hoping to get a good night's sleep and be up, out, and on my way to BlogHer '07 early tomorrow morning....me, my mushy brain, and my blurry eyes.   ~Joy   

Diet and Exercise and Health...oh my!

Okay, I'm having a little trouble staying on "the healthy track" again.  I have been for about a week now.  It's the bane of my existence....this 'healthy living' thing.  I wrap my head around it one minute and then just as easily unwrap it the next.  But, I'm laughing....and yes, I'm entering another 'serious mode.'  I'm going to kick this healthy-lifestyle-thing in the butt.....Yeah, when......

 

 

My exercise bike, lots of water, lots of salads....and a few prayers wouldn't hurt.

Just Say No....

I’m Free….kind of.  Thank God for season finales!  I always say how guilty I feel watching all the shows I’ve become addicted to.  Guilty, yes…but not enough to just accept it if I should have to miss one of them.  I rarely let that happen…only in extreme circumstances.  Even at that, I furiously look for a way to salvage that lost episode before the next one appears….otherwise it seems sacrilegious!                                                                                                                  In my attempts to stay current I have:

~ Taped shows that I’d have to be away for.

~ Had my daughter tape shows that I knew I’d be missing.

~ Found the episode I missed on On Demand.

~ And in some cases….my last ditch effort….called a friend who had watched the episode, to squeeze out every last delicious detail.  Obviously this was when all else failed.                                                                                                                     

Right now…this moment, I think I’m as unfettered from my addictions as I am ever going to be….and here’s why….                   

American Idol ~ Done

Dancing With The Stars ~ Done

Heroes ~ Done

The Apprentice ~ Done

Boston Legal ~ Done

ER ~ Done

Grey’s Anatomy ~ Done

Desperate Housewives (semi-addiction) ~ Done

Sopranos (soon to be Done…for good!)

Studio Sixty (again, will be done soon and won’t be coming back)                            

And…I can only think of one new addiction that I’m adding right now…So You Think You Can Dance. Well, I knew I couldn’t go cold turkey!  If there is a way to just ignore the slew of new shows that will be premiering over the next weeks and months…I’m going to do it.  I’ve already done it for some shows that have been on this last season.  I just refused to watch them…even though they looked like “my kind of drug.”                                                                               

As relieved as I am to have some of ‘the monkeys off my back,’ I am hardly drug-free.  How can you be when you have an eager and willing supplier? My son, Joe, makes sure I don’t go for long without a ‘hit.’  In the past he’s had me strung-out on past seasons of:            

Homicide: Life on the Street ~ Thank God that show came to an end.

The Wire ~ Still a work in progress.

Deadwood ~ Died too soon.

Rescue Me ~ There’s still some out there just waiting for me.

CSI – Las Vegas, Miami & New York ~ God forbid we should miss a city.

Veronica Mars ~ This season is its last, so there’s hope.

Firefly ~ Lasted only one season….thank you.

24 ~ Just finished a marathon week of Season 5.  Won’t dry out  from this one for  a while….too many damn seasons.

House ~ Don’t remember which season we ended on…still lurking.

The Shield ~ More to go…thank you Joe.                                                                

If I’ve missed any its only because they came one right after another and they all started to blend together after a while…like a weird acid trip.                                 

So, I’m almost clean, and it feels good.  Joe’s been trying to get me to try something new….. Battlestar Galactica.  But you know what; I just look him straight in the eyes and say NO!  It’s the first sign I’ve had that I can kick this thing.            

To all my friends who want to share their addictions...go ahead.... CONFESS!  Come on 'junkies,' I know you're out there. 

Blog Guilt

I’ve got it!  It’s been creeping up on me for a while now.  I’ve managed to keep it at bay for the last couple of months, but it’s rearing it’s ugly head again.  This week especially…while Jory’s been home and we’ve both been working on our computers…me upstairs, she down.  We've both been feeling our share of blog guilt.  Occasionally we yell to each other with questions or comments.  Maybe we should have set up the string and two cans system.  You can hear the tap, tap, tapping of the keys throughout the house.  Hers in a much more frenzied effort to catch up with her e-mails, write reports, and finally….to write a couple of posts.                                           

My blog guilt bubbled to the top again yesterday when she managed to find time to post a piece on her blog, Pause……”Why I’ve been a Bad Blogger.”  Funny enough it was about the very same thing I’ve been having a little angst over….guilt about not blogging as often as we’d like….check it out.                                                                                                                  

Jory gives much more compelling excuses than any I could muster up…..actually she lists them.  What’s my excuse?  I have plenty of time.  I’m not traveling all over the country, or rushing to meetings, or speaking anywhere.  My excuse?  Focus.  It just hasn’t been there as much lately; and I’ve been so easily swayed away from focusing that I feel it keeps me from writing about anything substantial.                                                                                                           

It’s not like I haven’t been LIVING on this computer….that’s NEVER the problem.  Between working on the Blogher site, reading and keeping up with my daily blog buddies, and posting….the latter has suffered.  Thus….the blog guilt.  I suspect it will ease up and I’ll feel better about it; although I’m heading into another period where my blogging will take another substantial hit of neglect.                        

I’m leaving on March 31st to go see my daughter, Julie, and my two grandchildren, Bella and Bastian.  I’ll be gone until April 9th.  Though I’m making arrangements to be able to work on the Blogher site while I’m away….I have no plans to post anything on my blog at that time.  I’m anticipating feeling MAJOR blog guilt….again…..still.                                                                                   

There was a time when I’d NEVER let this happen.  I seemed more on top of things.  I get worried that I’ll just run dry of things to say….at least anything that would be worth listening to.  That the days will run into weeks, and my thoughts…along with my brain….will shrivel up and turn to dust, like a sun-baked carcass lying on the desert sand…never to inhale a fresh breath of air again. A little dramatic…maybe.  Nevertheless….I worry.                                                                                            

  Actually, I think the addition of working for Blogher has just changed the dynamics for me, that's all.  It’s a pretty constant gig….but one that I’m enjoying very much, and learning an incredible amount from in the process….thus the adjustments to continue to work with it while I’m away visiting family.  Cripes…I’ll be Jory for that week….only on a MUCH smaller scale.  That’s why ‘I get it’ when she comes in town.  I get that she’s got to make all the ends meet everyday.  I get why her laptop is virtually glued to her body, with her cell phone in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other.  I’ve given her space….unconditional space….whatever it takes.                                                      

Jory leaves tomorrow for New York…. the next leg of her trip.  We’ve had some really good talks while she’s been here.  We’ve watched a couple of movies, some TV shows, gone out to dinner for Joe’s birthday and even played a little trivia….albeit, she was working at her computer in the next room and chimed in from time to time when she heard a question and wasn’t too absorbed in her work. She still counts that as being involved…and we accept it for what it is.   We ‘get it.’ We all have come to understand what Jory’s life is about at this point.                                                      

When I go to Julie’s in a couple of weeks, she has planned to have a computer available for me to work on…..she ‘gets it’ too.  As someone who exists very much like Jory….but in the world of academia…..she understands only too well.  The tap, tap, tapping will be heard from different rooms in Julie’s house too….only her husband, Chris, will be a part of the symphony.                                                                                                             

Between the many hours I plan to spend with Bella and Bastian, the much anticipated chats and activities with Julie and Chris, and the time spent working on Blogher….I’m hoping to keep my blog guilt to a minimum; or at least postpone it until I’m back in the quiet of my little room tap, tap, tapping away trying to breathe life into that dusty carcass.  

It's Thanksgiving...so of course, Merry Christmas!

We barely had our turkey dinner under our expanding belts when my daughter, Jenna, started hauling out my Christmas decorations.  Our plan was to have a nice dinner and then put up the decorations....oh, how festive.  What was I thinking?

My girlfriend, Carole, sat in stunned amazement at the collection of decorations I've managed to amass over the years.  "I don't remember seeing half of this stuff. When did you get all this?  It's like walking into a Hallmark store."

Yeah, Hallmark and I have been in direct competition for years now.  I venture to say, I could give them a run for their money.  The difference is, they're making money with this stuff...and mostly off of me. 

Ever since I can remember, I've had a "love/hate" relationship with ALL of the holidays, with Christmas being the worst.  I just can't seem to say NO.  I've thought, when I die, who's going to want to be saddled with all of my obsessive purchases?  Who's going to want to store them away and carry on the tradition when I'm gone?  As much as my children LOVE when I decorate the house with all of my paraphernalia, not one of them would be looking forward to that task.

Jenna, who's VERY much like me when it comes to decorating for holidays, doesn't have a spare inch in her apartment for another thing. Joe, my son, doesn't decorate...It's a guy thing.  But, let me forget even ONE thing that he's used to seeing at my place, and believe me he notices it.  "Hey, where's that Christmas calendar you used to hang here?" OR "Mom, you ARE going to hang my Xmas stocking, aren't you?"  Then there's my two minimalist daughters, Julie and Jory.  I think...NO, I'm positive, most of whatever decorations they may have probably came from me.  As a matter of fact, I've got two boxes just waiting to go to the post office with a bunch of "goodies" inside to make their homes more festive for the holidays.  I can't help it....IT'S A CURSE!

  As Jenna kept coming out with more and more decorations from the room I store them in, I became more and more overwhelmed.  I wasn't even sure I wanted to get started.  But, once they were all staring me in the face...I had no choice.  OH, my aching body!! Just a prediction. Why did I get up so early Thanksgiving morning?  Didn't I know I'd need any extra rest I could muster for this project?  Normally, and I'm not sure how normal it is, we've waited at least until the day after T-day to decorate.  It seemed like a good idea at the time when Jenna suggested that we do it early because it was just going to be the two of us all day.  My friend joined us after some urging to get out and come join us.  She said she was so glad that she did; but now I wonder.  Her head was spinning and she came disasterously close to getting whiplash straining to see everything.  I could see she was exhausted just watching.  She left early to leave us to our fun and games....COWARD! 

We managed to find a place for EVERYTHING...always a challenge that gets worse each year.  Well, almost everything.  I still have a wreath and a quilted "Jolly" sign that have no home yet.  All in good time. 

Next is the tree.  That's today, when Jen will make a return engagement and Joe is available to help.  The tree has become Joe's Christmas chore...but, he doesn't seem to mind.  The only thing I should ban him from (and I think he's secretly counting on it) is actually decorating the tree. He doesn't have the eye...or the patience, that Jenna has for finding just the right spot for ALL of my ornaments.  Another one of my obsessions....ORNAMENTS!  All kinds...many handmade.  My only criteria is that they are either really beautiful...or adorably cute; and anywhere in the middle.  I'm sure you can see my problem.  I can't blame Joe....honestly; but Jen understands.  We have a lot of laughs every year with my tree....mostly at my expense.  But hey, whatever it takes.

When we're done, noone loves to sit and bask in the glory more than my kids.  Our own "mini" winter wonderland.  And all it took was two hesitantly willing volunteers, a couple of tiring days, and ONE aching back.  Well worth the tradeoff.

I Feel Like Knitting....

  I think it’s the weather…that crisp, clear pre-Autumn air, just a little cooler temp kind of weather.  The kind I love.  Sweater weather!                                                                                          

There was a time when I loved wearing those big bulky pullovers…in my younger days.  For some reason I don’t have those in my wardrobe anymore.  In fact, I’d have to think long and hard if I even have ANY sweaters anymore.  I don’t get cold easily….even in the winter; so I suppose they haven’t been the first things I’d pick to wear.  But, I do appreciate a beautiful sweater, and always comment when I see one.                                                    

I use to make a lot of sweaters.  Loved knitting them…or crocheting sometimes.  I spent many hours, as a young mother, with a pair of knitting needles firmly ensconced in my hands….if not baby bottles, diapers, or whole children.  It was a pleasure I afforded myself….a relaxation.  Like listening to music or watching movies have always been to me.  Knitting was soothing.  Quietly creating something that would later be found on a loved one or draped over a piece of furniture in their home.  It had immediate results.  I liked that…the clicking of the needles and the feel of the yarn running through my fingers to form this network of stitches.  Click, click, click….a new link to be added to the puzzle.                                                                                                  I think that’s how I thought of it….like putting a beautiful puzzle together.  I love puzzles of all kinds.  I LOVE jigsaw puzzles.  I get the same sense of relaxation putting those together that I get from knitting.  Hey, I think I have something here…VOILA, hello light bulb!                                                                                                                                             I can’t remember when it was exactly that I hung up my needles and yarn, but it’s been longer than I’d like to admit.  I think I got side-tracked by this little thing called LIFE…..and its first cousin, RESPONSIBILITY.  A time in my life when my kids were SO damn busy and involved in EVERYTHING, that something had to go.  Who needs to relax every day anyway?  It’s highly overrated.  When you’re young and on the go, you barely notice its absence.  It’s not until later, when the pace in your life has again shifted, do you start to consider some of the things you’ve discarded or put on the “back burner” over the years.  I’ve had “knitting” moments such as these.                                                                                     

I’m having one again. Lord knows I’ve got ALL the paraphernalia…just sitting waiting to be used again.  I have no idea what I’d want to make.  During one of those “knitting” moments back a few years ago, I wound up making a checkered afghan for my eldest daughter, who still loves wrapping herself up in to watch TV.                                                                                                                                      I had another “moment” again a few years ago when I made slippers for all of my kids…and their significant others, for Christmas one year.  My kids love these things. They all wore them until they literally fell off their feet in shreds.  Hmmm, maybe we need to revisit my old slipper pattern again.                                                                                                             

  I can’t believe I’ve missed SO many perfect opportunities to get back into it.  There have been a lot of births of babies in my family….MY own grandchildren for God’s sake, that I have let slip by without nary a stitch on my part.  When I was younger, they would have had a whole wardrobe by now.  DRATS, I feel badly about that!  I guess I haven’t noticed it so much, since I’ve learned to spoil them in numerous other ways, so of course, I’m good to go.                                                                                                                      

As I write this, I’ve realized something.  I don’t need any excuses to start knitting again. I don’t need a “someone” in mind to make something for.  I don’t need to get back into it for any other reason, but that I love doing it.  It’s pure enjoyment….like movies, music, playing cards, writing poetry, playing games, BLOGGING….or any of the other things I thoroughly enjoy and have made a part of the routine in my life.  I feel like I’ve just figured out the “mystery of the universe” right here.                                                                                                                                                

I’m going to round up some yarn (I still have loads of it), and I’m going to start casting those stitches.  I don’t know what I’m going to start out making, but it will end up as something.  I don’t know how much these older eyes will endure, but we’ll deal with that when and if we come to it.  Heck, if I can spend hour upon hour in front of a computer screen every day….I think I can manage a few hours of leisurely knitting here and there.                                                                                                                           

Thanks for being a part of my therapy session everyone!  Hey, I’d love to know what enjoyments, hobbies, obsessions, etc. any of you have put aside….shelved….forgotten about over the years.  Things you’ve loved, but stopped making time for.  Things you’ve had to put “on the back burner” but never seemed to make it up front again.                                                                                                                           

Oh man, what about those little “spin-art” pictures that I used to make? Enough, enough…ONE therapeutic revelation at a time.  I just hope this doesn’t bite into my blogging time.   NAHHHHH, not gonna happen!